Monday, May 31, 2010

Day bazillion of pre-PCP life

yikes. just took those day #1 pictures and now I'm regretting the fact that I sent the link to this blog out to some people...but I know this is part of the project! And I'm going to continue to give people the link, even if knowing that those pictures are up there makes me cringe for the next few weeks. But hopefully soon I'll be proud of what happens with the pictures, right? sigh. i hope so.

Wait, I had a plan for this post. I won't be deterred by the photos!

So aside from worrying about my busted toe, and whether or not i'll be able to do the PCP exercises tomorrow (i'm constantly icing and elevating! what more can i do?!), I'm thinking about alienation a little bit today, and how I'm going to deal with the potential isolation that PCP might bring.

I've done various against-the-grain things in my life; I went to a women's college, I ran a marathon, I gave away my television, I've dedicated my professional life to advocating for "alternative means of transportation". There are probably others, many others, but those are a few obvious ways that I've alienated myself from various groups/individuals/audiences, including, at times, friends and family members. (They're also a few ways I've followed my heart and improved my life!)

As excited as I am about beginning the PCP, I'm also nervous about how this is going to set me apart from others. I have already had trouble explaining to people what PCP is (I don't even completely know myself yet, so that might be part of the problem...), but I can already see the familiar glazed-over looks, defensiveness or just general confusion. This bums me out not because I need 100% support from everyone (I have my fellow PCPers for that, right!), but because when I discover something wonderful, I want to be able to share it without making people feel that I'm judging their choices or preferences.

I think part of my process within this project is going to be a practice in how to relate to people better about my passions - about PCP, but also about other interests and projects in my life. In some ways I'm a born outreach person, always recruiting people to various activities and causes, but that doesn't mean that I'm necessarily always good at it, or sensitive to how I come across.

Another thing to work on for these 90 days...

Sunday, May 30, 2010

T minus 1.5 days until PCP begins!

By way of introduction, this is my left foot. Why, you might ask, am I choosing to display this [kind of weird/gross/random] picture on my first PCP blog post? Another picture, by way of explanation:

So, I busted my toe. (frozen veggies have always been my favorite icing method.)

Now, fortunately, I think I'm on track to be 100% healed by Tuesday, when our PCP kicks off. Here's hoping, because i'm going to need that toe to jump, I assume.
How I busted the toe is its own story, but here's the thing: obviously, being injured cramps my style, but it is an interesting pre-PCP reminder of how important it is to be strong, physically able, and all around healthy.

I had to fly to Cleveland with this busted toe, yesterday afternoon, and because my arrival gate was so far from the baggage claim I had to suck up my pride and ask for a wheelchair. A wheelchair! I can see the tabloid headline now: 28 year old healthy female, about to start PCP, takes wheelchair ride thru Cleveland airport!

The wheelchair experience was unusual. It got me thinking about how lucky we PCP-ers are to be able to even embark upon this project, let alone eventually complete it. There are so many people in this world who are either plagued by chronic disease or injury, who go up against daily physical obstacles that we --fairly healthy, able-bodied people-- can't even begin to consider. Plus, there are the strange looks of pity and sympathy that wheelchair-bound people must get all the time (based on how many I received during my one joyride, this must be a constant). I can see how irritating it can easily become - that feeling of helplessness, of reliance on others, of "otherness".

All this to say that now, more than on my regular no-toe-injury days, I feel grateful for my body, for PCP, and for my 6 fellow superstars who are preparing for this collective journey we've committed to. I'm more certain than ever that we're going to rock this PCP like it's never been rocked before!!!

Congratulations Tara, Naoko, Royce, Deborah, Jenny and Korf for jumping into this challenge, and thanks in advance for being my support system as we get going!

(oh, and in case you're wondering how I busted my toe: I was running away from a jellyfish. seriously.)